I have been serving in some capacity my whole life. And throughout those serving years I have had to re-evaluate, regroup, change directions and even start over in what God was calling me to do. Everything I do I want to make sure that all roads lead back to Christ. I have to remind myself that it's not about me, not about my music and not even about my story. Those are all tools that are being use to reach others. But sometimes in the middle of all that I can get lost. Not so much about my story or my music. I work hard to keep that in check but more about the work of ministry. I get so caught up about making sure I do my work, send out those emails, make connections, find events, etc that I'm back at the wheel and controlling my own directions. I'm so afraid that if I don't work hard enough, God will take it all away. There is such a fine line between being lazy and being controlling. I believe to be in ministry God is calling us to work. Not just wait, although waiting is something we all need to do too. In everything there is a season. I don't balance well. I'm an all or nothing kind of gals and God has to place me back in the middle. I'm all work, work, work, work, work and his telling me back off, back off, back off.
So, I'm working to listen to him so I don't try to SHINE so people can see me but Shine so that, through me others can see HIM! You would think that would be easy but honestly sometimes you just don't see the nose on your face. God is putting me in check right now. He's wanting me to trust his path and let him lead. He could force me to step back but that's not the kind of God I follow. He wants me to see what I'm doing and he allowed me the time to see it. I need to allow him to open the doors at least for this moment.
I'm kind of lost down here in Georgia. My friends aren't here. I'm starting over in ministry. I don't have the connections here I've had other places. People don't know me, trust, or even respect me for that matter. I've been told several times I'm a Yankee and although that's funny, there's something in that they are telling me. Through all that I'm trying to SHINE, shine without others seeing me but Christ. All of which is such a fine line walk. I'm trying to allow God to open the doors without me kicking them open.
Are you shining for yourself or shining so others can see Christ? What has God called you to do that you might just need to take a hard look at and see why you are doing that thing. Maybe it's time for you to re-evaluate, regroup, change directions or even restart your path. Here's hoping 2014 you draw closer to Christ and what he wants for you in your every day life. Here's to me staying on his path and keeping my eye's planted on him.
Happy January everyone!